stopping by the woods on a snooo...

So there I am. Standing in front of 60 parents, all who are there to hear me dominate my other classmates. As I stood there I froze. I was a nervous wreck. I took a step back, cleared my throat, walked towards the mic and said, "Stopping by the Woods on a Snoooohh." I look down and to my dismay, I have peed my pants in front of 60 people and all my classmates. So much for winning the top prize, so much for all the hard work, all I needed now was a new pair of pants and probably a change of country would have been nice as well. I actually did it. I couldn't believe myself. So a new pair of sweat pants, button up shirt, and clip on tie later I sat back down on stage. At the end of it all, I won third prize, because I wet my pants.
Oh, and just so you know this is all back in first grade during my "Poetry Week". It's all true and it really happened. The prize I won was a kite, which my older brother surely destroyed as soon as I opened it.

Why am I telling this really embarrassing story? Well the reason I blog about it, to the whole world, is because right now, at 11:59 A.M. the day before thanksgiving, I am feeling vulnerable. I feel sick. The things I once knew are now not there anymore and it hurts my heart and spirit to see everything fall apart before my eyes.

My life has been changed because of my parents going through a divorce. However, as I cast everything onto Christ, I look at the strength of one of my parents. This parent has become more and more grounded each time I talk to them. It strengthens me to do this. I am only so blessed to be where I am today.

My other side of me is hurting for the other. I have pain for both, but my loyalties seemed to have shifted. A good friend told me that it is not about me. This is between them, yet I still feel like I am in the middle. I pray that no one knows this pain.

Through all of this vulnerability, I am able to stand firm on the one thing. Though the house may have been broken down for lack of care to it, my foundation in Christ is as solid as ever. Christ has shown me many things and has opened up great discussion with my students, my girlfriend, and many others. I have been able to find perspectives from all different avenues of life. God has really made me stronger, even though I feel vulnerable to it.

Christ said that I will do greater things than He. I firmly believe that Christ has blessed me and will continue to do so. Though my family is in disarray and everything seems to be falling harder and faster each time I get a phone call about something, I see that Christ has still done many great things.

Through our weakness, Christ can shows us a new way to lean on Him and try to grow and understand His plan for us more and more. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable.

Also, as thanksgiving approaches, know that I am praying for those who read this blog. It is a blessing to be able to somehow keep a small memoir of my thoughts on the internet for all to read. Christ has done many things and greater things are yet to come!

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and may God bless the table you are at.


sharonchristiansen said...

We missed you, Drew and Patrick as well as your mother over Thanksgiving. I am still praying that God helps heal the marriage and brings the family back together. Love you guys!

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